I don’t remember how you looked.

I don’t remember how you looked.

Your eyes were blue, maybe hazel green?

Your hair golden blond or maybe strawberry red?

I  try to describe you and each time I remember less.

Sometime I dream of grasping your hair,

our bodies fighting for the sake of pure pleasure.

You calling out my name, words of love.

You spoke only in the turmoil of sex.

I yearn to see you still.

Your sweet hello’s were sweet and long.

Our goodbyes were long and written deep into the walls of my heart.

I remember your long legs.

You dressed like a woman.

But had the hunger of a child,

seeking the education of the tongue, the touch and the long ride.

I don’t know if you remember me.

I still seek you.

Your hunger was to become mine

and my hunger was to touch you again.

I lost you on a cold Spring day.

I became old as you walked away

with tears and too many words spoken.

I released you for my hunger was to have you forever.

You were seeking a place to rest and get strong again.

Your wish to be free. Was more powerful than mine to

in prison an angel.

I still wish for a gentle knock on my door.

To hear your sweet hello.

Fall into your arms again.

Life is only fair in sweet dreams.

I wish to see you.

To look into those beautiful eyes.

To remember how you looked.

John Coyote

1984/rewrite 2012