Should of loved you more…
He left love doorway 2,500 miles away. The hardest and coldest man, he loved the whiskey and he loved the taverns. He loved the darkest days and he loved the sea. He learn too late, love is the sweetest days and love is rarely near.
A crying soldier telling him in the tavern. I can go home to my wife, I am so damn angry. He told the young soldier, go home and fall at her feet and tell her. She is your everything, she is the gold in your life. Confess your pain, fall together. Love is the healer my friend. She is waiting for you and if you falter to the whiskey. You will become me. The lonely poet near the sea. Drinking the damn whiskey and screaming names of a love gone and forgotten. The soldier pushed the whiskey toward the old soldier and he told him. I left her crying and she is waiting. He told him, call her and tell her. Please forgive me and I am coming home. I know your are the sweetest and kindest person in my life. I will buy the coffee. The young soldier called his wife and he came back, he took the coffee. He looked at the old soldiers eyes and he asked him. Did you love someone somewhere Sgt. C? And thank you for stopping me from falling into the shit of self-pity. She is waiting and she told me. I will take care of you and please come home to me. I am here.
He watched the soldier leave and he wrote in a journal.
“Should of loved you more…
Did I love you enough?
Did I do enough?
I should of ran to you,
not away.
Now I have pretty pictures,
a sour heart,
the whiskey and the sea.
I learn the lonely man prayer,
I pray for thing lost,
I pray for love gone,
Too late to seek forgiveness,
cold hearten men,
get their due payment.
I told the Pacific yesterday.
I should of loved you more.”
Dancing Coyote